Married and Navigating Jewish Life

Blogging about marriage and relationships

Archive for September 2008

No, seriously, we are still here. This is what happened

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So we have been doing the following

1) New Job

2) Moving

3) Prepping for new baby coming soon

Sooooooo this is why we haven’t posted.

Expect a post by Sunday though, we have some new topics to discuss.

Have a GREAT SHABBAS!

Written by frombrooklyn

September 26, 2008 at 1:30 PM

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Take care when you shop at the store ‘where everything is better’

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Seriously.

We have had the experience of several times noticing that the price listed on the shelves of Pomegranate is not what the computer shows.

Not that we are singling out this store, other stores are guilty of this as well. Sometimes its an accident, and we aren’t saying they do it on purpose but really people EVERYONE NEEDS TO CHECK THE RECEIPT AFTER THEY GET IT AND MAKE SURE THE PRICES MATCH THE PRICE ON THE ITEM OR THE SHELF. That way you can save your pennies and the store can make sure they don’t accidentally steal from you.

Written by frombrooklyn

September 22, 2008 at 3:15 AM

Where does the line between being open about sexual ideas end? Well; we have some thoughts about that

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As many of you know, we are all for married Jewish people (though we will not judge the many frum singles who do things as well) be open about sexuality and it’s place within the relationship between the opposite genders. It isn’t something to be closed minded about. Experimentation and knowledge needs to be encouraged. So many therapists inside frum communities have to deal issues that really damage a marriage when it comes to sex.

Normal discussion and curiosity is okay. However sometimes these things are taken to extremes. People become addicted to porn. Talking in chat rooms or forums lead to cybersex or hook ups in person. People begin to have unrealistic expectations from their partners because they become focused on things they read online. 

Jews of course have put themselves out there as well. You have a yahoo group called frumsex, flickr has three groups dedicated to jewish nude pics but only one claims to actually have anything, kinky jews have their own website, and I am sure there are many more hidden because they aren’t on the internet but are between groups of friends.

The bottom line is that people need to remember there is a fine line and one needs to know what they can handle. If you cannot handle going near the line, make a wall between you and that line. If you can, then no one should judge you. Always make sure that your spouse knows what you are doing – they are your guidance in this. Of course, spouses need to realize that just because you aren’t into something doesn’t mean you should automatically shut it down. A couple needs to work together or at least keep tabs on themselves.

 

 

 

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Written by frombrooklyn

September 12, 2008 at 4:09 AM

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Heter to postpone children – in any fashion. Why is it so hard? Readers share your stories

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We have been reading up over by CK lately that there seems to be more posts about getting the heter to either 1) wait to have children OR 2) to prevent pregnancy due to medical reasons. Many people seem to have a problem getting the heters they need.

There are many reasons why people want a heter. They might want to enjoy being married. Having financial difficulty. Medical issues related that would become worse or fatal if one became pregnant. All of these reasons have one thing in common – none of these people have a wish to never become pregnant. They want to have children. Or they have already had the number of children required and want to take things slower. Unfortunately for many people they seem to be stuck and become resentful about this entire issue.

So we are wondering, who has had this issue? What were your reasons to postpone? Did you have a hard time finding a heter or did you just do it on your own?

Written by frombrooklyn

September 9, 2008 at 2:15 AM

It’s that time of year again, school uniforms are now back by popular demand…Marriage Dressup 101

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Well, was talking between ourselves today because we got caught up in the crowds concerning the whole back to school sales and buying sprees. One thing led to another and the topic of school girl outfits came up.

It aint what you think. Well, maybe.

According to many polls most males share this common fantasy: School Uniforms. I guess it has to do with the whole innocence factor of the idea. So this came into a connection with a previous topic. It’s hard to get Jews to understand that sometimes bringing in outside accessories/costumes/toys can add a spice to life. Really, Orthadoxy is really shun in unless you know someone who knows this stuff OR you have decided to seek it yourself. Plus, lets also be honest here: There is a cost factor. People don’t want to buy items of clothes or toys and see that it won’t work. They’ll feel foolish.

So, here’s an idea.

Go through the closets of your spouse. Find clothes you think ‘turn you on’ or more appropriately ‘make you really want to rip them off of your spouse and make another attempt at having a kid (or practice at making one for all you preggy and BC people out there). Now with men, our wardrobe sucks but I’m sure something in there must turn you on. Innocent Oreo Boy? Manly Plumber/Worker Guy? Oh damn just in my Joe Boxers?

For women, if your wife actually brought over her HS clothes, well now you have a better selection since really for most men, we enjoy the school girl outfits. Of course there might be different opinions but women have some nice stuff. Lingerie, short slips, heck they can even wear their husband’s shirt with nothing underneith.

So besides the fact that the title of this post probably will drag in the trolls out there because it says ‘school uniforms’ we are hoping that maybe this will make all of you decide to go into your closets and find something you want your spouse to wear in a night of passion (or day) or want to wear to try and entice the other to taking you.

Enjoy

/Husband and Wife

Written by frombrooklyn

September 1, 2008 at 2:26 AM