Married and Navigating Jewish Life

Blogging about marriage and relationships

Would we make a Shidduch with anyone from the Torah?

with 7 comments

Got this email and thought it was very correct. 

Would we make a Shidduch with anyone from the Torah? 

There’s Avrohom Avinu: He seems to be frum but really he’s a BT and his father made idols, not our kind…next. 

Yitzchak Avinu: Well his grandfather made idols, there was all that nastiness with Lot, and is half brother is an arab. 

Yaakov Avinu: His great-grandfather made idols, his brother went off the derech, his mother comes from a very treyfe family and he wasn’t shomer negiah with Rachel Imeinu before they were married and he spent a lot of time with his uncle, who’s mammesh a rasha. 

Yosef HaTzaddik: His mother had an idol once and she died early, plus he’s a slave and his brothers don’t like him, must be something in that, and with all the issues with Avraham Avinu and Yitzchak and Yaakov Avinu…better not to. 

Moshe Rabbeinu: Oy, what a maaseh!!!! His parents separated, then they got back together, his parents abandoned him, put him in a basket, he was raised by goyim…not our kind for sure. He may be close to Hashem but his background is so problematic we wouldn’t want him in our family! 

Calev’s descendants: We don’t want to marry into that family. Enough said.

Dovid HaMelech: Descendants from a Geyoret, not our kind of people. Sure a few generations have gone by but all things being equal, shouldn’t we look for someone with more of a ‘jewish’ background. 

Shlomo HaMelech: See above, all his mother’s marriage was very dubious, he is rich though, but the yichus and family background is very tricky.


Written by frombrooklyn

November 26, 2007 at 6:10 AM

Posted in Uncategorized

7 Responses

Subscribe to comments with RSS.

  1. hilarious but oh so true!

    Rafi G

    November 26, 2007 at 8:38 AM

  2. very nice and funny but people out there might actually think you were serious


    November 26, 2007 at 8:00 PM

  3. Actually we are serious. Unfortunately many people in our communities judge based upon ‘Yichus’ and ‘Connections’ than they do about the actual person. They constantly judge the person of the shidduch based on their parents, grandparents, etc. It is utterly wrong. While people who are looking to get married might be concerned about such things it is normally the parents who are obsessed about it. Hense why the Gemara says that parents aren’t supposed to be involved in the decision of shidduchim. If a person is not old enough to be able to do something without checking with Mommy and Daddy they aren’t ready to be able to enter a marriage as a husband or wife.

    If you took those backgrounds, didn’t say who it is based on and went to go ‘read’ them to others you would see why this joke is a serious as one can be.


    November 26, 2007 at 11:12 PM

  4. are you inferring that we are on the same madregah as the avos? as moshe rabeinu? as dovid hamelech?

    ideally you would be correct that these things shouldn’t matter. but don’t you realize that we are spiritually weaker and must be more careful than they were?

    Lion of Zion

    November 29, 2007 at 4:18 PM

  5. i thought i left a comment here?

    Lion of Zion

    November 30, 2007 at 8:29 AM

  6. Lion,

    You did leave a comment but all comments must be approved before being published. Unfortunately not everyones comments are polite.

    As for your first comment it sounds very much to me in line with the elitish higher than though approach that many are having today in the Yeshivsh/Black Hat world. There is no such thing as exempting someone because of their family or their background unless it is affecting the here and now. How can someone who wasn’t so religious in HS but then went to Israel and came back frummer than the boy next door be condemned because of his HS years? How can a convert raised from birth as an aishel chayil be put down because she is a gerus?

    And no, do not even dare state ‘well there are special circumstances’. There aren’t any. Either you are a Jew or you are not. Either you are religious or you are not. Want to marry someone with specific machmirs and follows certain Rabbis then fine. Want to marry someone because of their personality, midos, and looks? Go ahead. Not to marry someone because you feel that they are tainted by the fact they are BT, Convert, or you dislike their family? There is no such thing as that be allowed by Chazal/The Gemera/By HALACHA ITSELF. It sounds like to me the smell of the Bais Hamikdash shel Shemayim burning like the first two burned due to the fact that Jews turned on one another in this kind of manner. The buck doesn’t stop at shidduchim. It has continued onward in all aspects of personal and business association especially in the Black Hat/Yeshivish Communities – most notably in any community which is NY or can be considered ‘NYish’ such as Monsey, Lakewood, etc.

    It’s about time its stopped.


    December 1, 2007 at 10:35 PM

  7. […] by frombrooklyn on December 1, 2007 See original post here The quoted text of the comment: “but don’t you realize that we are spiritually weaker and […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: